Thursday, February 19, 2009

Need to lose weight?

Have you seen this ad?  Of course you have, they're impossible to avoid on the interwebs these days.  Ugh.  In preparation for today's blog post, I actually clicked on a few of these to see what they were all about.  All I could figure was that acai berries were somehow involved, and most people think this is a scam of sorts.  

I figured it was a scam, if for no other reason than you simply don't see ads proliferated to this extent for something legit (unless they're for McDonald's or something, and those are just more like a weight gain scam instead so it evens out).  It's pretty clear that there are a lot of players in the acai berry weight loss game right now, and obviously anyone with two pennies to rub together can grab some pictures off of Google image search and slap them in an ad as "before" and "after".

For example, check out this ad. 

Is it just me, or does it almost look like they put two women together in front of the same window at the same time, took the picture, and then cut it in two?  No matter what, these two pictures don't seem to be pictures of the same woman.  

That leaves us with this beauty:

First of all, at least I believe that these pictures are of the same person, so that's a plus, but what's up with the "2 Rules (obey)" thing?  It just doesn't make any sense, grammatically or otherwise.  And then at the bottom it says she lost 35 lbs by obeying this "One Golden Rule", but at the top it says there are two?!?  Color me confused.  I think there really are two rules, and they are as follows:

1.  Send us lots of money for acai berry weight loss stuff.
2.  Use the acai berry weight loss stuff that you sent us money for and commence weight losing.

Actually, there are probably a couple more rules in the fine print now that I think about it:

3.  Once you've used up the berry stuff you paid lots of money for to begin with, please send us more money.
4.  Oh, and please don't exercise.  You'll lose weight way too fast if you add exercise into the mix, thus decreasing the amount of money we'll make with this berry crap.

Anyway, I'm sure this is a fad and will hopefully soon go away, but I really have never seen ads like this take over the net the way they have.  They're literally everywhere I go, so I had to post this to get them out of my system.  

Rant over.


  1. Nice rant.
    It would be nice to see if they had an infomerical about these products but it would be hard to photoshop people if they actually moving. Have you seen the ad of the old bald dude that is just ripped? They go out of their way to mention that the picture was not altered. If there was a magic way to lose weight quickly it will be a hell of a lot more expensive than what these companies are charging. It is like the penis enlargement pills. If they really, really worked they would cost a whole lot more.

  2. hmm I thought it was you at first haha JK!!

    Yes these ads are ANNOYING

  3. And how could you have just completely left out the colon cleansing part? Really....

  4. Shife - Yeah I've seen that old dude. He's creepy. It says on the ad he's got the body of a 30-year-old, but that's not what I see in the mirror...

    Phats - How do you know they're not me?

    Emily - I obviously didn't do enough research on this topic. You know I couldn't have resisted discussing colon cleansing.

  5. That was the second mysterious rule ;)

  6. I can't believe you didn't get Emily anything for Valentines!

  7. awesome post! i think if people eat NOTHING BUT berries, there could quite possibly be some truth here.